A year is 365 days (most years). That's time to think. Time to mourn. Time to grow.
This week I've been in Canada. (Hey, Toronto - I had a great time. On my calendar to come back.). As I usually take quick 1-2 day trips for business, packing for this trip revealed a surprise.
Up in the attic, I pulled down a suitcase with fold-over capacity. A suitcase good for 3-6 days travel, depending on how you pack. Built-in hangers that are great for suits or dresses. Corner pockets perfect for scarves and jewelry. Still in the suitcase's corner pocket was the tiara - yes, tiara - I wore on the flight to my wedding. "Bride To Be" in shiny letters with a bit of veil-like netting. (He dared me to wear it on the plane - I never pass up a dare.) That suitcase had held my wedding dress 4 years ago.
I looked at that tiara for a minute or two. And it brought back not one good memory. It just made me think of how I'd been fooled and played for a fool. I put the tiara in the trash, and I realized my life is very much the same and yet totally different 364 days* after my divorce.
Today would've been my wedding anniversary. I'm not sad. I'm blessed. I've got a job I love, a nice guy in my life, a little house that needs some work and a vast community of people who love me. More people than I ever knew. That was the blessing in disguise for me - I thought I lost love when I got divorced. Instead, I found out I'm loved by more people than I ever knew. As new people enter my life, I also learned I'm both worthy of love and lovable.
Take-away - To paraphrase Anais Nin - one day the caterpillar thought she was going to die. She slept in pain and struggle and awoke a butterfly.
*Yeah, if you did math the divorce was final a day after our anniversary. Choices. His. Always.
One of my fave pieces of yours! Your outlook is healthy and so refreshing. Good for you!ReplyDelete
"Every new beginning is some other beginning's end"
Thank you! As always I'm thrilled you read it. It was an interesting week with a lot of realizations.Delete